Sometimes it takes something special frustrating and upsetting to bubble to the surface to grant me inspiration to write these posts. In those cases I guess they become rants and, thus, are probably rambling and lacking in coherency. For that much I'll have to apologize. That is the vein that inspires this post, frustrated and apologetic.
As a member of a generation of young people who seem at times listless and at other times driven, sometimes inspirational and sometimes excessively stagnant, I have often been struck by our sense of insecurity as people. I would be slow to believe anyone who claimed they were free from insecurity and anxiety in their lives and I have suffered from these as much as anyone else. They are perfectly natural and, I believe a recurring part of our lives that must be allowed to play its role. A potent defensive mechanism that should be listened to. These tell-tale signs our subconscious throws our way can often be difficult to interpret and destructive in their nature, but it seems to me that it becomes its most destructive when we pay them no attention or, worse, smother them.
Depression and anxiety awareness is gaining a growing voice in our society and this is fantastic news. I know very little of depression so I won't make assumptions in this post, but all too well I know of the façade we often front ourselves with. We are obsessed and terrified with how others perceive. We worry what our friends think of us, our workmates, strangers even! It is this fear that drives our behaviour, and some of it is beneficial. Most people won't streak down Grafton Street because...hell, what would people think? Think of what? Think of us. The streaker. But then again, others will do exactly that...for the exact same reason, bizarrely.
Young men are forever surrounded with concepts and images of what is macho and masculine, of what is cool and what will get the women. I find it unlikely that any heterosexual male has every had the thought of "oh shit...what if?" when the first gay person enters their life. What would be think if one was gay, shock, horror! Undoubtedly, young girls and women are subject to these expectations as much as boys and men. It is both fundamentally beneficial and horribly damaging. However, one of the fundamental flaws with the general masculine male facade is to be strong. A real man doesn't suffer from insecurity, a real man is a rock, we are told.
This last month three young men have died from NekNominations. This is absolutely horrendous. Under what circumstances does society deem it too far. The point when peer pressure manifests itself in the form of unintended suicide. It has become a completely expected aspect of youth to drink to excess. This is a fundamental weakness in our social confidence. People often frown when I say I rarely drink, but when I drink I drink to excess. It is a weakness that needs to be fought, but at least I am aware of it. Too many people, I feel, suffer from this social anxiety. The impules, the need felt by my generation to get absolutely wasted every time they want to socialize with each other is a tragic sign of our absolute inability to be secure and happy in one others company in sobriety. Surely "pre-drinks" would not have developed to be such a norm if this was not a fundamental flaw in our thinking. How many 17-25 year olds say they "couldn't stand x nightclub if they weren't hammered." Surely this is a sign that we are not truly able relish in sociability without intoxication. The implications for this speak for themselves, but they have come to light even more fundamentally through NekNominations.
I would like to point out, that I am not claiming the three young men to be insecure beings, but that a masking requirement has emerged a social norm in a very dangerous form. The need to anaesthetise ourselves has clearly existed for generations, but when this destructive, narcissistic trend that has emerged as normality on our social medias is combined with it it grants a pat on the back for people who are essentially falling prey to their own personal weaknesses, and we are to blame.
We define ourselves by what exists within the box, it is impossible not to. Every complex of possible identities is within the box. It is the opposite of something else so we must fall into programme somewhere...there are only so many binaries.
Does this mean young people are forever condemned to live lives of of fear and worry, stressing over whether or not they are meeting societies expectations of what they are supposed to be? Maybe. I hope not though. We are probably condemned to insecurity regardless, but what I think is important is that we are conscious of the trends of our mind. Descartes famously wrote "I think, therefore I am." But it is not enough to think...or even to be. We must live, and for this we must be conscious. We must know what we think, be able to identify the trends that exist in our minds and recognize when these trends are destructive, to ourselves and to others.
Initially when I began this post, it was out of anger. I intended on finishing this post with something along the lines of "I make no apology for my anger at those who have wantonly participated in this trend." Instead I will write that we are all victims in this scenario. What frustrates me is that we never ever seem to learn from our mistakes as a society...one day, I hope! I just wish our self induced emotional smothering didn't cost us young lives!
As a member of a generation of young people who seem at times listless and at other times driven, sometimes inspirational and sometimes excessively stagnant, I have often been struck by our sense of insecurity as people. I would be slow to believe anyone who claimed they were free from insecurity and anxiety in their lives and I have suffered from these as much as anyone else. They are perfectly natural and, I believe a recurring part of our lives that must be allowed to play its role. A potent defensive mechanism that should be listened to. These tell-tale signs our subconscious throws our way can often be difficult to interpret and destructive in their nature, but it seems to me that it becomes its most destructive when we pay them no attention or, worse, smother them.
Depression and anxiety awareness is gaining a growing voice in our society and this is fantastic news. I know very little of depression so I won't make assumptions in this post, but all too well I know of the façade we often front ourselves with. We are obsessed and terrified with how others perceive. We worry what our friends think of us, our workmates, strangers even! It is this fear that drives our behaviour, and some of it is beneficial. Most people won't streak down Grafton Street because...hell, what would people think? Think of what? Think of us. The streaker. But then again, others will do exactly that...for the exact same reason, bizarrely.
Young men are forever surrounded with concepts and images of what is macho and masculine, of what is cool and what will get the women. I find it unlikely that any heterosexual male has every had the thought of "oh shit...what if?" when the first gay person enters their life. What would be think if one was gay, shock, horror! Undoubtedly, young girls and women are subject to these expectations as much as boys and men. It is both fundamentally beneficial and horribly damaging. However, one of the fundamental flaws with the general masculine male facade is to be strong. A real man doesn't suffer from insecurity, a real man is a rock, we are told.
This last month three young men have died from NekNominations. This is absolutely horrendous. Under what circumstances does society deem it too far. The point when peer pressure manifests itself in the form of unintended suicide. It has become a completely expected aspect of youth to drink to excess. This is a fundamental weakness in our social confidence. People often frown when I say I rarely drink, but when I drink I drink to excess. It is a weakness that needs to be fought, but at least I am aware of it. Too many people, I feel, suffer from this social anxiety. The impules, the need felt by my generation to get absolutely wasted every time they want to socialize with each other is a tragic sign of our absolute inability to be secure and happy in one others company in sobriety. Surely "pre-drinks" would not have developed to be such a norm if this was not a fundamental flaw in our thinking. How many 17-25 year olds say they "couldn't stand x nightclub if they weren't hammered." Surely this is a sign that we are not truly able relish in sociability without intoxication. The implications for this speak for themselves, but they have come to light even more fundamentally through NekNominations.
I would like to point out, that I am not claiming the three young men to be insecure beings, but that a masking requirement has emerged a social norm in a very dangerous form. The need to anaesthetise ourselves has clearly existed for generations, but when this destructive, narcissistic trend that has emerged as normality on our social medias is combined with it it grants a pat on the back for people who are essentially falling prey to their own personal weaknesses, and we are to blame.
We define ourselves by what exists within the box, it is impossible not to. Every complex of possible identities is within the box. It is the opposite of something else so we must fall into programme somewhere...there are only so many binaries.
Does this mean young people are forever condemned to live lives of of fear and worry, stressing over whether or not they are meeting societies expectations of what they are supposed to be? Maybe. I hope not though. We are probably condemned to insecurity regardless, but what I think is important is that we are conscious of the trends of our mind. Descartes famously wrote "I think, therefore I am." But it is not enough to think...or even to be. We must live, and for this we must be conscious. We must know what we think, be able to identify the trends that exist in our minds and recognize when these trends are destructive, to ourselves and to others.
Initially when I began this post, it was out of anger. I intended on finishing this post with something along the lines of "I make no apology for my anger at those who have wantonly participated in this trend." Instead I will write that we are all victims in this scenario. What frustrates me is that we never ever seem to learn from our mistakes as a society...one day, I hope! I just wish our self induced emotional smothering didn't cost us young lives!
